Believe It Or Not...

Believe It Or Not...
by Raven Usher

What I am about to relate to you, my dear readers, is true. Any number of you may not believe it. I could hardly believe it and I was there. But I assure you, as strange as it sounds... it really happened.

In the February issue of Diversity, I told tale of some of the signs that show transsexuals that they have achieved an outwardly passable appearance of their gender identity. Most particularly, I spoke of two women that mistakenly thought I have breast implants. Their over-heard conversation was a wonderful affirmation of my femininity.

In the past month I have had another such affirmation. Once again, a person who was born female overlooked my male history and queried me a question that no man could ever be asked. This time, however, the woman who posed the question was not a stranger. She not only knew me quite intimately as a man - she also knows me rather intimately as a woman.

Knowing that the people with whom I share a special closeness are now seeing me as the woman I have always wanted to be is having a profound influence on me. As any transsexual goes through the metamorphosis of outwardly changing his/her gender there is always a certain level of guilt. Transitioning is an incredibly selfish process that throws the lives of friends and loved ones into turmoil, at least temporarily. The purpose of transitioning is to save oneself. The inevitable side-effect of causing others pain is an unavoidable issue of overwhelming regret.

Last month that regret was effectively lifted from my existence. A single fateful question banish all doubt from me that I have done the right thing in pursuing my transition. For that, I will be eternally grateful. Especially as I eternally laugh at the question that set me free from my guilt.

Here is the story.

My wife of fourteen years, whom I impregnated three times prior to my transition, was sitting by my side on the couch. We were winding down from the day by only half watching a re-run of an old Seinfeld episode on late-night television. The episode that was being aired was one that is responsible for adding a particular phrase to the American pop-culture slang - “spongeworthy.”

For those of you who do not watch Seinfeld, let me expound. Elaine found out that her favorite method of contraception, the Today Sponge, was being taken off the market. She then went on a quest to acquire as many sponges as she could find to build up a ready supply. The short supply of sponges prompted her to begin judging perspective partners on weather or not he was worthy of expending a portion of her limited supply on him. If he was, he was deemed “spongeworthy.”

In the midst of this “spongeworthy” episode my wife, the woman who watched her husband morph into her wife, turned to me and asked, “Have you ever used the sponge?”

No, I am not kidding. She really did! All i could do was stare, slack-jawed, at her. It seemed even the characters on the TV paused in their performances and were staring out of the set at her in disbelief. She sat there waiting for my answer. I broke into laughter and nearly fell off the couch.
Many years ago we promised each other that we would be together for no less than seventy years. We have fifty-six to go. Rest assured, I will be teasing her about this the entire time.
Blessed be.